“Amazing Race,” crazy twist, and more on “That Voice!”

by,

Suzanne Coleman

 

So all of you guys who have been keeping up with my “Bachelor Gossip” posts (and you know who you are 🙂 ) have probably already read my post on Whitney’s voice.  If you haven’t, you can read it here:

Bachelor Gossip: Whitney and that VOICE!

So now, there is another girl to add into the discussion!  On this night’s premiere of “The Amazing Race,” one of the girls on a blind date FOR THE ENTIRE RACE! (awesome idea btw directors) is Hayley, a very (bleached) blond girl who is also a nurse.  Right away when she talks you can hear that she speaks in a very high-pitched voice, just like Whitney on “The Bachelor” does.  If you watch Hayley’s interview on cbs.com you can hear that her voice is not always up that high though.  For her, it’s hard to say, but I think it might be some of the same issues as for Whitney (the “little girl voice”), but I think anxiety might be a bigger factor because she goes in and out of the high voice while she’s being interviewed.  I can understand that, I mean, she IS being filmed to be watched by millions of people… yikes!  I have to say, that is pretty darn brave.

When they started racing, and her and her partner disagreed on which way to go, I loved it when she was right and her partner was wrong!  LOL in your face, boy! 🙂  I’m starting to like her…

So back to this season’s premiere of “The Amazing Race,” what a crazy idea to put together two total strangers for a how many months-long race around the world?  Crazy!  High stress but also what an amazing (ha!) opportunity, don’t you think?  I can’t wait to see what happens with all of these pairs this season.  It will be very interesting and I applaud the show for coming up with a truly new idea to freshen up not only reality shows but this one in particular that of late has not been keeping my interest.

I am going to call this “the love season.”  Something that is long overdue 🙂

 

 

Follow my posts by clicking on the blue “follow” button at the top right of the page.

Join us on facebook at http://www.facebook.com/sliceiconic

 

Is Carly from “The Bachelor” a Sociopath?

 

The Bachelor Gossip, framed

by,

Suzanne Coleman, MD

 

She’s been called “evil.”  She’s been called a “bully.”  But, what is she really?

Well, we can’t really tell just from some clips of her, because you know how editing can make someone seem like something they’re not, but what we saw in those clips does give us an idea of what kind of a person she might be.  Let’s talk about what behavior we see in those clips.

She seems to lack empathy.  This means that she seems to have no heart, and doesn’t seem to feel for other people, and for what they are going through.  This is not normal.

She seems to enjoy watching other people suffer.  This is not normal.

She seems to do things to make other people suffer.  This is not normal.

She seems to manipulate Chris Soules, and seems to try to manipulate the other girls, so that they will all hate Britt.  This is not normal.

She jumps all over one thing that Britt said and can’t seem to understand that people can say things about something and then change their minds after they learn more about it.  Carly seems really rigid and inflexible in her beliefs.  That is not normal.

What do all of these behaviors have in common?  They are behaviors that you can see in someone who is a sociopath.  Now, I want to be clear, this isn’t saying that Carly is a sociopath, we don’t have enough information to make that type of assessment.  But it is important for everyone to understand that “bullies” and “mean girls” can have behaviors characteristic of sociopaths and other types of psychopaths.  “Sociopath” and “psychopath” are terms that refer to people with types of mental illnesses that are called personality disorders.

The medical term for sociopath is “anti-social personality disorder.”   There are several types of personality disorders, all of which can cause problems in relationships, but anti-social personality is one of the worst.  Approximately one out of every 75 men, and one out of every 300 women is a sociopath.  People with anti-social personality disorder can be very destructive to those around them; they often seriously disrupt families, businesses, organizations, governments, and society in general.  And they are all around us.

How do you know when you are dealing with a sociopath?  Sometimes it can be hard to tell because some of them are very intelligent and hide their bad behaviors very well.  On the other hand, there are the ones that aren’t trying to hide their behaviors.  Sometimes people call them assholes, and sometimes people call them jerks.  Sometimes people just don’t know what to call them, they are so completely abnormal in their behavior, it leaves others speechless.

But whether they are easy to identify or not, sociopaths do things that other people would not.  Some deliberately hurt other people for their own personal entertainment.  Some spread malicious lies behind other people’s backs in order to cause chaos and disruption.  Some act in a calculated manner to ruin people’s relationships, their reputations, their jobs, and more.  Sociopaths live as though the law and the rules do not apply to them, and that they can do whatever they want and get away with it.  Ethics don’t exist in their world.

And to top it all off, some sociopaths will find the horrible things that they are doing to be really funny.  And they will enjoy planning and executing them, like it’s a game.  You can often find them smirking to themselves as they plot against you, literally.  If you see any of these behaviors in someone, think sociopath.

An interaction with a sociopath will often elicit a strongly negative reaction from you, and you may not be able to figure out why you are feeling so upset.  It might be because you can sense that they are violating your boundaries, or that they are showing their lack of concern for right and wrong.  Pay attention to those feelings, and remember this article if you ever encounter anyone like this.  It’s usually best to stay away from them if you can.  But if you can’t, it may be helpful to directly confront their behaviors in front of a group of other people who can witness what happens (unless they are sociopaths too).  Otherwise the sociopath will keep on manipulating and lying and playing their evil little games behind everyone else’s backs.

 

Like us on facebook at:  www.facebook.com/SliceIconic

AND click on the blue “FOLLOW” button on the upper right of this page to stay tuned!

________________________

Please note that this is a very broad and complex topic and that this article only discusses limited aspects of it.  The above is for informational and educational purposes only.  If you have any specific questions or concerns, please see a physician or mental health professional.

_________________________

 

Beautiful pink explosion of nature!  Original abstract art for your home or office, by Suzanne Coleman. ©Suzanne Coleman, all rights reserved.

Beautiful pink explosion of nature! Original abstract art for your home or office, by Suzanne Coleman.
©Suzanne Coleman, all rights reserved.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Art for sale HERE:  https://www.etsy.com/listing/211491305/bright-pink-flower-abstract-art-on?ref=listing-shop-header-0

 

 

Empire Gossip: Last night’s episode, OOoo the Drama!

Empire Gossip, framed

by,

Suzanne Coleman

Ok guys, so what did you think about last night’s episode?  Pretty dramatic huh?  🙂  So much went down…

You know when they showed the preview last week of Cookie and Lucious MAYBE kissing, I was like, oo-ooh, do you think they will?  But then last night…  Haha, ok, well they certainly didn’t hesitate to get back to business now did they?

I think it’s good, sort-of…  It’s obvious that they have a real connection.  But I think it’s also obvious that he really hurt her in the past, and what the hell was that?  So to be letting him back in now, that is probably going to be a big mistake for Cookie in the future.  I mean, he already showed her what he thinks of her while abandoning her for SEVENTEEN YEARS while she was in prison!  Hel-lo girl!

I think a lot of the women out there know it can be hard to let go of that true love from your past, especially if there is real chemistry, even if he was an ass.  But, hopefully as we get older, we grow and learn from those mistakes and don’t let them happen again.  Right girls?  Um, Cookie?

Now on to some BUSINESS!  Does anybody else think it’s obvious that Cookie will be the one who gets to run Empire in the end?  I know, last night kind of made it more obvious, but it has seemed that way to me from day one.  She is IN CHARGE!  She is the smart one, she knows how to handle people, she knows her music and her artists, and she is clearly a great speaker, as we saw in the episode last night.  All good skills to have to run what is really HER company after all.  And let’s face it, not one of her sons has the skills to do it.  Even combined they don’t.

There is one thing that Cookie isn’t good at, and that is trusting the people she should.  That bit last night about Elle really bugged me, in SO many ways.  Elle worked hard to get clean from heroin and then Anika (what a FREAK) dopes her to get at Cookie to make her look bad.  I mean, seriously, SICK.  Felonious-sick.  And when this happens Elle TOLD Cookie she was clean and Cookie could see that she was clean, I mean, you could tell that Elle was on board with staying clean and working hard, so then why did Cookie just turn away from her so easily?  She sticks by “her man” after all of the crap he has pulled, but the person who has worked hard for her and shown her loyalty, Elle, she just blows off in a second?  That kind of bad decision-making might just turn around and bite her.

I hated to see Elle stabbed in the back like that, not only by her supposed supporter, Cookie, but also by Cookie’s damn jealous rival, Anika.  The show made it look like one of the security guards (I think that’s who that was) might have seen what happened, so hopefully it will come to light that Anika is evil, and Elle can get back into the business she is so good at, singing.

And Anika?  Anika needs to go.  To jail.

What do you think?

 

Like us on facebook at:  www.facebook.com/SliceIconic

AND click on the blue “FOLLOW” button on the upper right of this page to stay tuned!

_______________________

Bachelor Gossip: Whitney and that VOICE!

 

The Bachelor Gossip, framed

 

by,

Suzanne Coleman, MD

Ok, first of all, I want to say Whitney seems like a really decent person.  She’s got her life together, she hasn’t been shown to be mean like Carly to the other girls, and she respects herself.  I wanted to be clear on that because I’m not writing this to put her down in any way, I’m writing it because I have noticed something about the way that she speaks which I think that we as women should all take a moment to think about in regards to ourselves and the women and girls around us.  I mean for this to be a positive post, not a negative post.

So if you’re watching ABC’s “The Bachelor” (and we know you all are!) you know that Whitney is a young lady from Chicago who is vying for the attention of a farmer dude from somewhere in the middle of nowhere, pretty much literally.  She’s one of the final three ladies left before he decides who he likes the best for himself (she can say yes or no, but they usually say yes…).

From the first time they showed Whitney* on the show, I noticed that her voice was very high pitched and a bit whiney.  It came across as if she was trying to sound like a little girl who is trying to get attention.  I have noticed this same kind of behavior in many girls and women before.  They seem to be deliberately, though not necessarily consciously, mimicking a young girl’s voice and behavior.  I think that it’s something that some women do subconsciously in order to get attention from men.  I think it might have to do with their relationships with men growing up, or other people around them, who might respond more willingly to what sounds like a young girl who needs help.

I have noticed that men do seem more interested in women who speak this way.  Men may be hard-wired to do so.  And girls who find that they get more attention by using this type of voice are probably more likely to continue to use this behavior to get attention as they grow up into adults.

I think that women, on the other hand, respond more negatively to this type of behavior.  I think that when we see a young lady or woman acting like a child who doesn’t speak in a way that we would expect for their age and maturity level, it bothers us.

When someone speaks this way, it might also be related to some kind of anxiety over one’s self and how you fit in with others around you, like a self-esteem issue or insecurity.  Anxiety can cause the voice to rise upwards in pitch, so it may be a part of why the high voice happens as well.

I would like to suggest to the women and young women out there who find themselves speaking in a voice that is higher than their actual voice, or in a submissive or needy way towards men or others, to make yourselves aware of that behavior and see if you can stop that habit.  I’d like to see all girls and women proud of who they are, and not acting overly submissive, like a child, towards others to get attention or anything else that they might want or need.  You should not be afraid to speak out and speak up for yourself.  If you find that you do feel that way, then that is something that you should explore.  I am a strong supporter of counseling as a way to find the strongest, healthiest you.

So getting back to “The Bachelor,” I’m pretty sure he picks Whitney in the end.  Why?  On the first show they highlighted her a lot and it really stuck out to me.  They seem to do that with the finalists and more so with the winner.  Just a feeling… I guess we’ll find out soon enough!

_______________________

* Now I want to note, that I mention Whitney because so many of you noticed her voice.  I thought it would be a great opportunity to bring up this topic and I am using her voice as an example, but please realize that none of the discussion comments in here are about her in particular.

 

 

Like us on facebook at:  www.facebook.com/SliceIconic

AND click on the blue “FOLLOW” button on the upper right of this page to stay tuned!

_______________________

 

Empire Gossip: Ooo That Voice Serayah!

Empire Gossip, framed

 

by,

Suzanne Coleman

Serayah, Serayah, Serayah, o.m.g. you truly have the voice of an angel.

Ok guys, I just had to do a quick post on this.  If you are watching the new show “Empire” on Fox you will know what I am talking about.  And if you aren’t, you’ve got to check it out on http://www.fox.com!

Serayah plays Tiana Brown, a young singer who is managed by the Empire label.  She’s got a spicy role, like the rest of the show, that keeps you on your toes.  There’s no boring and predictable up in this house!  But what blows my mind is when she sings; her voice is amazing.  Her tones are awesome.  She is a huge asset to this show because not only can she sing (and I mean, boy, can she sing), but she is also beautiful and unique, and a good actress as well.  And her hair is cool, it’s like “BOOM!”

You can check her out in this video:

http://www.fox.com/watch/394566211625/7684647168

at the one minute mark of play you can hear her singing.  Wow.  While in this clip she’s only singing for a few seconds, you can hear her ability well.  The show’s episodes have more of her singing and you can watch those online at http://www.fox.com.  I had to post about her, she is a beautiful young lady with a real gift and I hope she goes far and stays grounded if she does.  She is crazy awesome.

Oh, and I also wanted to give a shout out to another of the show’s actors, Bryshere Gray (or to the show’s writers) who must have read my blog post on “Empire’s” pilot episode.  In a recent episode Bryshere talks about being “Iconic” (you know, like “The Slice Iconic”…) 😉  Hey, hey, thanks for the mention!  Every time I hear it, it’s pretty cool.  🙂

 

 

Like us on facebook at:  www.facebook.com/SliceIconic

AND click on the blue “FOLLOW” button on the upper right of this page to stay tuned!

_______________________

 

Bachelor Gossip, Carly and Britt

The Bachelor Gossip, framed

 

by,

Suzanne Coleman, MD

 

Carly and Britt… Ah… Carly and Britt…

What an uh-humm interesting duo.  I wonder what the other girls really thought about these two.  The show seemed to show only Carly’s opinion, as she manipulated everyone else around her into agreeing with her.  Or wait, maybe that was a bit of bullying?  What do you think?  She certainly seemed to be a bit obsessed over Britt didn’t she?  And with trying to hurt her.  That sounds like a bully to me.

Personally, I was glad to see her get the boot.  Especially after the show showed her saying how she didn’t care if she left the show as long as something else happened (can’t remember what it was anymore, but I’m pretty sure it had to do with Britt…).  She clearly wasn’t there for Chris, she didn’t have the right intentions for being on the show, and she was clearly enjoying bullying Britt.  Not.  Cool.

Britt is gorgeous.  She did seem self-absorbed, but she wasn’t mean or evil to anyone and didn’t deserve to be treated so badly in my opinion.  Yes, the night where she interrupted Kaitlyn getting the rose was totally wrong, but I can understand what prompted her.  I guess there could have been more going on behind the scenes then we saw… that’s true.

I guess both girls have some room to grow, I just hope they look back on this time and realize that for themselves.  I would think of it as an opportunity to become a better person.  What do you think?  Add your voice in the comments.

Go here http://sliceiconic.com to follow my blog, and click on “subscribe” at the bottom left of the page.

 

 

Like us on facebook at:  www.facebook.com/SliceIconic

AND click on the blue “FOLLOW” button on the upper right of this page to stay tuned!

_______________________

Bachelor Gossip, Jade

The Bachelor Gossip, framed

 

by,

Suzanne Coleman, MD

Hi all, I just wanted to talk about “The Bachelor” a little bit.  For those of you who are watching, let’s talk about last night’s episode, shall we?

So if you watched, you saw the super cute and sweet young lady named Jade tell the Bachelor, Chris, about her past.  She was holding on to a big secret and it was time to tell it.  She had posed for “Playboy.”  She sat him down and they talked about it, she even showed him the pictures and video of it (I’m not sure why) and then he told her how it didn’t matter to him.  And then he cut her loose.

So, let’s talk about that.  I want to know what you all think.  Do you think she should have told him?  Do you think she should have showed him her pics and the video of her nude?  Do you think he let he go because of it, even though he, of course, said it wasn’t that at all…

Here are my thoughts on it all.  I think she should have told him, but much later in their relationship.  There was no need to tell him at this point as they are really just starting to get to know each other and find out if there is a connection between them.  If they found that they were in love and headed for a serious relationship (I know, this show isn’t really normal life…), I think that then she could tell him about it.

Should she have shown him the pictures?  In my opinion, absolutely not.  He didn’t ask to see them, and it was not necessary or appropriate.  That might have been the deal-breaker more than anything.  It would be so uncomfortable to be in a new relationship with someone, and to have them show you nude, and probably not so “artistic,” pictures of themselves.  And even video.  Besides making the other person very uncomfortable, they would have to question why you would want to show them these very personal photos of yourself.  Plus, you are really ruining the mystery in that aspect of the relationship.  Now, discovering each others’ bodies will be a bit, tainted.

I’m not saying there is anything wrong (or right) with her posing, that is her decision absolutely.  The human body is something that we all have, there is nothing shameful about it and we should never feel that there is.  But it is something special, which for her is now out there in the open and has changed the way that he looks at her and thinks about her.  I think that is unfortunate.

I wish her the best, and I hope she finds it.  I think she can do better than Chris anyway 🙂  I did really like what he said to her as he let her go, he told her that knowing her was “a gift.”  I think that is one of the most beautiful things that I have ever heard.

http://abc.go.com/shows/the-bachelor/cast/19-bachelorette-jade

 

 

Like us on facebook at:  www.facebook.com/SliceIconic

AND click on the blue “FOLLOW” button on the upper right of this page to stay tuned!

_______________________

 

Beautiful preserved oak savannah along Lake Michigan by Suzanne Coleman.  ©Suzanne Coleman, all rights reserved.  Click on the link below to go to the shop.

Beautiful, preserved oak savannah along Lake Michigan, by Suzanne Coleman.
©Suzanne Coleman, all rights reserved. Click on the link below to go to the shop.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Art for SALE here:

https://www.etsy.com/listing/208012241/fort-sheridan-savannah-in-fog-nature-art?ref=listing-shop-header-2

 

 

Downton Gossip

IMG_5031

Michelle Dockery who plays Mary on “Downton Abbey.” By jdeeringdavis from San Francisco, CA, USA (Flickr) [CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)%5D, via Wikimedia Commons

 

by,

Suzanne Coleman

Hi guys, so I have to ask, WHAT IS UP WITH MARY?  I mean, she is so rude and abusive to her sister.  Is she like seriously jealous or what (ok she looks super cute in this picture)?

What really bugs me the most though is that her parents are sitting there right in front of her and don’t say anything about her ridiculous behavior.  I mean, that just wouldn’t fly here, and we aren’t even “super-mannered” like these people are.  There is just no excuse for it.  I can’t believe that her parents are so passive.  Very uncool.

Finally in the last episode her Granny said something, but why did it take so long?  Maybe you can enlighten me, I admit to not having seen the first 2 seasons or so, so maybe there is something I am missing, but still… unacceptable.

What do you think?

 

 

Like us on facebook at:  www.facebook.com/SliceIconic

AND click on the blue “FOLLOW” button on the upper right of this page to stay tuned!

_______________________

You Are Beautiful, for real

 

By Michal Osmenda from Brussels, Belgium (you are beautiful  Uploaded by russavia) [CC BY-SA 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

By Michal Osmenda from Brussels, Belgium (you are beautiful Uploaded by russavia) [CC BY-SA 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)%5D, via Wikimedia Commons

by,

Suzanne Coleman

A little while ago I was driving south on Lake Shore Drive in Chicago, heading to Jackson Park to do a little migration birding (great stuff!) when something unexpected happened.  I was just driving along, looking around at the newly improved parks and habitats along the Drive when suddenly I saw a big sign that said “You Are Beautiful.”

I started to cry.  It was like a sudden attack of good that I wasn’t expecting.  So often we are guarded against the possibilities of something bad happening, but something good, like this unexpected random kindness, well, it just snuck right in and got me.  A wave of emotion came over me, I couldn’t help it.

As the emotion subsided, I thought about how many other people may have been positively impacted by this single sign every day…  It could be millions.  Amazing.

I believe in random acts of kindness.  I believe that one act can make a difference.

When I was in college, a few years ago (or more), someone put homemade stickers on the mirrors of the women’s bathrooms all around campus at the University of Illinois, in Urbana-Champaign.  The stickers said “This is the source of all self-doubt.”  Wow, right?

It was a brilliant campaign to boost our awareness about how our self-esteem can be negatively impacted by physical expectations impressed upon us by mass media.  It made us more aware of how and why we might be feeling and thinking some of the things we were as young women, and made a positive impact.  Those stickers remained up for quite a while, months I think, before some started to be removed, but their message was strong and clear.  As you can see, I still remember it more than a few years later.

I never learned who the artist was for that public campaign, but I have learned who the artist is for this one, Matthew Hoffman.  Apparently, he has been running his “You Are Beautiful” campaign for a while now, and I was just out of the loop.  He started with stickers himself, and the movement grew from there to include installation art like the piece I came across on the south side of Chicago.  This project has reached all around the world.

While I was perusing his website  [http://heyitsmatthew.prosite.com/123202/about] to learn more about him and his artwork, I came across his mission statement; what is the impact that he hopes his artwork will have on others:

“Do you know that song, that when you hear it, it grabs you and takes you to a moment? A vivid memory you can’t escape feeling. Maybe it’s a summer, or a relationship. It might pump you up, and you start sprinting. Or maybe it crumples you, and takes you back to that night you sobbed in your car.

On my best days, that’s what I want my work to resonate. Personally, I want to experience moments. To really feel all the highs and lows. In my work, I want to create moments for others. I do my thing, and they are able to feel whatever they need to in that moment.” – Matthew Hoffman

I think he pretty much nailed it on the head with me.  Good job Matthew.  And thanks for spreading all the love and joy to the world that you have through this project.

I wonder what great acts of kindness will come next?  How will they start?  With a smile, or a helping hand?  Or maybe, just maybe, another sticker will find its way into our hearts reminding us that we are all living beings, here on this planet together, that we all love, we all feel, and we all hope.  I wonder if that will start with you?

 

 

Like us on facebook at:  www.facebook.com/SliceIconic

AND click on the blue “FOLLOW” button on the upper right of this page to stay tuned!

_______________________

But What Does He LOOK Like?!

"Inmate of Elmira Reformatory showing four views of head".  H. Havelock Ellis, The Criminal.  See page for author [CC BY 4.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

“Inmate of Elmira Reformatory showing four views of head”. H. Havelock Ellis, The Criminal. See page for author [CC BY 4.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0)%5D, via Wikimedia Commons

Ok guys, what do you think about this?

I moved back to Chicago about three and half years ago and I was watching the news and I was like, “huh, what?”  They were reporting on a rapist who had attacked several women in a particular area, but they didn’t describe him.  I was like, “uh, ok, so what did he look like?”  Nope, nothing.  Then they moved on to another topic, smiles and all.

So I guessed that they thought that describing the criminal’s race was now taboo.  I was like, “What?  Really?”  Wow.  Seriously, we are not doing well as a society when we are too scared to describe someone to help save other people from being victimized.  Describing the race of a criminal DOES NOT MAKE YOU A RACIST.  Holy @#$%.

What is going here guys?  If a black man commits a crime, are all black men criminals?  Makes no sense, right?  It’s about as logical as saying that describing someone’s race, makes you a racist.  It doesn’t.  And that’s the point.

My safety and the safety of all other people in society is more important than a news channel’s fear of being attacked for stating a fact about a criminal’s race.  If they don’t have a strong enough leadership to understand that, they can come and hire me, no problem, I’ll guide them.

The news channels have chosen to take on a responsibility to report the news, I wish they would realize how much that means to us as individuals and as a society and not allow a small number of vocal people to overpower the majority of Americans (of all races) who want to keep themselves and their friends and families safe.

 

 

Like us on facebook at:  www.facebook.com/SliceIconic

AND click on the blue “FOLLOW” button on the upper right of this page to stay tuned!

_______________________