Caleb Joins “Survivor!”

by,

Suzanne Coleman, MD

Hi all!  Are you as excited as I am about seeing Caleb Reynolds from “Big Brother” on “Survivor?”  Omg, when I saw him in the season preview my mouth dropped open!  (Not like Olivia’s though, that would be scary.)

If you didn’t see Caleb on “Big Brother” he was the super built guy from the South who speaks in a nice Southern drawl 🙂  He does crazy karate or something like that and jokes around a lot.  He is a loyal player so that will be cool to see if he is true to himself or if he plays the game more strategically this time.

There have been a lot of people talking on facebook about how Caleb was obsessed with some of the women when he was on “Big Brother.”  It started of with Amber, who was beautiful, though a bit on the skinny side I think; she had green eyes and curly hair and was a gentle person.  He fell for her hard and fast and no matter what she did or said, he thought it was mutual.  Unfortunately, it wasn’t and it took him way too long to hear that she was telling him she wasn’t interested in him.

Through watching him with her and later when he talked about other girls it became obvious that his behavior was really obsessive.  There are a lot of people who get obsessed with other people, or ideas, or politics.  But there’s a point where it just isn’t healthy, for them or those around them.  That’s when you need to start thinking about getting help, like going to counseling.

When being obsessed becomes a problem, it’s probably some form of obsessive-compulsive personality disorder.  You can see this in people who shoplift as well.  What they have in common is a feeling that they find hard to ignore, for example it might make them feel like they have to do something or be with someone.  It is hard for them to realize it is unhealthy, because they’ve been like this for a long time, and most likely they grew up with someone similar, so they think it’s normal.  These feelings that they can get can move them to act in ways they might not otherwise, like stealing, or harassing someone to relieve the pressure of the feelings they have inside.

There is treatment for this, and if someone chooses to check into getting help, they’ll likely grow a lot if they go to counseling.  It’s a great way to better understand one’s self and how they can be a better and healthier person, and it works.

So people have all been talking about whether or not Caleb has dealt with any of his obsessive issues.  They are wondering if he will start obsessing over anyone on “Survivor” this year.  If he does, how will it impact his game?  Will he put people off?  Will his obsessive loyalty be his end, or his strength?  You never know!  It all depends on him and the people he ends up playing with this season.

I know that I for one will be glued to the screen to find out!  Hope to see you there 🙂  Feel free to comment below.

 

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What is causing all of this anger towards Kaitlyn? Find out here!

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by,

Suzanne Coleman, MD

There’s been a lot of conversation surrounding the behavior of many fans towards Kaitlyn, the current Bachelorette.  I wanted to take a minute to talk about that.

You might be surprised to learn what the reasons are that some of these people are acting this way.  Have you ever heard of obsessive-compulsive personality disorder (OCPD)?  You might have heard of obsessive-compulsive disorder because it’s been talked about quite a bit on TV over the last decade or so.  Well, OCPD isn’t the same thing, though they have some things in common.

OCPD is where the word “fan” originally came from, well that was back when the full word was used, “fanatic.”  OCPD are people who are literally obsessed and feel compelled to act on those obsessions.  This can be an obsession with anything or anyone.  It can obsessions with famous people, someone down the street, religious ideas, political issues, and more.  The problem comes when the person isn’t able to see clearly and rationally due to their illness, and then acts in an unhealthy way, for themselves and/or others.

With Kaitlyn, her choices this season (and the choices of the producers of the show “The Bachelorette”) have struck a nerve with a good number of people.  Some of the people who have had a problem with her decisions have lashed out at her, becoming degrading and verbally abusive.  This is their attempt to control her behavior, which obviously they have no right to try and do.  But, because people who behave this way often have OCPD or trait, their obsessive disease forces them to express their opposition to what she has done in forceful ways, and that is called compulsion.

In addition, people with personality disorders are generally inflexible and have difficulty compromising with others.  This often becomes an issue when they cannot accept others’ different points of view or life choices.  So when they are faced with someone who lives their life in a way that isn’t one that they would choose, or that they have been told to believe is “right,” then this causes them a lot of internal angst and they can lash out as a result.

Most people with this disorder aren’t aware that they have it and don’t know how to get the help they need in order to stop the problems that it can cause.  OCPD and other personality disorders are not uncommon, in fact one out of every seven people in the US has a personality disorder.  Those who have them will generally benefit from counseling which can literally change their lives for the better.  It’s important to understand that these are diseases, no different than diabetes and high-blood pressure.  And like those diseases, they also require treatment and monitoring to get them under control.  In this case, counseling with a therapist qualified to treat personality disorders and abnormal personality traits is what is needed.

The people who have these disorders do not choose to be impacted this way by their illness, and no one should lash out at them or be hateful towards them in response.  Instead, look at this as an opportunity to be compassionate towards those who cannot control their impulses, try to lead them to the help that they need in a supportive manner.

Also note that OCPD isn’t the only underlying reason for abusive behavior, but I have found that it is a very common one.  There are other personality types that abuse as well, including borderline PD, anti-social PD, and narcissistic PD.  Helping to increase the understanding of the reasons behind why some people do what they do might just lead some people to get the help they need to live a happier and healthier life.

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*Please note that I don’t know any of the people who have made negative comments about Kaitlyn individually, and no one can make a definitive medical diagnosis without a proper evaluation.  This article is meant to share information on general behaviors and what likely causes them and not to label any individual or individuals.

Never hesitate to seek out help from a professional, it just might be the best thing you ever did!  And I always tell people, if one counselor isn’t working out for you, just find a different one.  It’s your health and it’s your decision.

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